With That Outfit? Are You Asking

For months, maybe more than a year, practicing to write this text. While I consider the importance of discussing the topic, especially from the point of view of those who work with the language of clothes, I feel somewhat daunting to have to talk about a subject that should be so obvious. But, despite my faith in humanity down considerably when I think about it, I decided to leverage the #16diasdeativismo to try to give my contribution to this issue.

We’ve already established how the image speaks. Not only speaks, as is a hell of a chatterbox. All image consultant assumes that when we get(and here come in hair, makeup and other things besides the laundry), us determines how others act with us. Yes, that’s true. And no, you can’t get away with it because this is a mechanism that we use since prehistoric times according to andyeducation.com.

But, you see, we determine with relation to the level of receptivity, also if the person knows more friendly or more defensive, even rough. This is determined if we account for the appearance, if it is more criativona or weighted, if you like to stand out or have a higher note, if it allows new interactions or not … And, Yes, one of the things that we care for each other, we talk about our relationship with the body and sexuality as well. We say if we allow love more, if we want to enhance that, if we want to call the attention for the beauty or the main point is the content.


“I want to be destratada, assaulted, raped”(physical or psychological).

If a woman uses a shorter skirt or a neckline pronounced(or both), she wants to, Yes, show others those parts that she likes so much. That’s how she sees herself beautiful–and, after all, who doesn’t want to see beautiful and feel desired, right?

In fact, if it appears in the buff, this may mean that you feel fully comfortable with his own body, to feel beautiful, sexy and loves to be admired. Even so, unless a woman tell you explicitly, what does your interest and your touch, it doesn’t give you the right to invade her space.

So this idea that”look what she was using” is absurd, if you spend a few seconds in”But What Was She Wearing”(tumblr that documents the clothes women wore when they were harassed), you will see that most of the women I was with the body very well hidden when were flouted.


Yes, whether in text, conversation with customer, class or workshop, I always talk about how sexy style elements need to be dosed(or removed) in professional environments where content is paramount. That’s because there are situations for everything in this life and what we have to tell others is more important than our body shapes. At work, for example, the time we spent studying and acquiring experience must come first than the time we spent at the Academy or the result of that boob job. Regardless of gender or sexual orientation.

When a client says he wants a more productive and sustainable relationship, but feel that only relates to passenger interests and superficial people, also rolls a recommendation to think in less obvious ways of being sexy, on ways to put the other to feel beautiful is a concern, but there are so many other things that support your corpitcho. The point here is not that the woman turn a nun, forget about your sexuality, nor that when she wears a cleavage she’s shouting to the world that it’s only interested in sex, but she wants so many other qualities are perceived and valued.

When she’s going to meet the sogrões, we also discourages some outfits and the list follows. Similarly we advising against a woman use a corporate suit if she just want to sexualize in ballad and find someone to enjoy a couple of hours. It’s a matter of fitness needs and goals.


Before closing, I just wanted to remind you that, as Freud and Lacan have sang the ball, what moves us is the desire. The Lacan already said that desire there nor is ours. It is the desire of the other(the environment in which the people, the culture that is imposed on us, so, by whom, and in the middle of which we were created, etc.–that is, that what we were constituted/, because we always constitutes the other, until you know what you’re talking about Zucchini here). In short: everyone wants to be in the desired position. It’s just that, at least in my brief contact with the psychoanalytic theory, I haven’t seen neither Freud nor Lacan and not anyone talking about what moves us is the desire to be harassed.

And, look, working with image, we see that everyone finds a way to express that. Both the girl that wears a skirt short, as the one that closes in a leather coat. I’ve met(including students and clients) women who were part of religious circles with various restrictions on clothing, which has that feminine design as coy and submissive, and guess what? Analyzing their prevailing styles, several of them had as main sexy style. You see: the way of life the idea of modesty, decency and conservatism. No cleavage, no things, nothing short of”call girl’s lifeguard who Tryna” and yet several elements that projected that the sensuality was something extremely valuable in their personalities. They also wanted to put in the desired position. It was also important to them. But, you know what they don’t want?

That’s that.

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